The Blaisdell Blog

I am a smuggler.   There!   I’ve said it!    And, yes, there is a measurable lightening of the burden I carry.   It is my fervent wish—no—my hope and prayer that this public mea culpa will remove the dark shroud of guilt that weighs like a leaded blanket on my soul.   You see, the corruption of my act does not extend just to me, but to my child as well.   But before you judge, hear my story, and then deal with me as you will.             My daughter has a soft heart especially where lost or abandoned animals are concerned.   Living on acreage outside of Minneapolis , she had room for her growing menagerie, but none of this served her well when she accepted a promotion to Atlanta , Georgia .   She was going to have to make a move on the run and a call to her mother was the first task on her, “to do” list.              ...

There are two animals that God clearly created on a bad hair day: the camel and the moose.               Moose are not native to Newfoundland , but this island now has 4 moose for every square mile of land and Tom and I were hoping to see some of them.    Unfortunately, despite spending a month here, we had not had a moose sighting.   That changed on our last night on the “Rock.”   Moose were introduced to Newfoundland in 1904.   In that year four moose arrived safely from Nova Scotia .   They were “…in good health, had not missed a meal and played when they were let loose.”   The four beasts were released near Gros Morne National Park .   More moose were sent from time to time, but never more than a handful. The moose didn’t need any help.   They looked around, saw a sub-arctic climate, rugged terrain with food and water aplenty and promptly started to multiply.  ...

I picked up the headset and held one side to my ear.   There was the voice—calm, methodical, every tone measured and precise.   In the Gander Aviation Museum I was listening to recordings of air traffic control.                 “Delta one five heavy, this is YQX approach, squawk zero seven seven niner.”             “United two two three heavy, this is YQX, descend to 5500 and hold for approach.”             “American four six heavy, this is YQX, you are clear to land zero three.”               The term “heavy” refers to a wide body airplane.   Air traffic control handles these by the dozen every day.   You would have thought it was any other day.   But it wasn’t.        ...

Some times there are real advantages to not having a television.   We are currently in Newfoundland and depending on our Sirius radio. The good news is we can get music, Cardinal’s baseball, and--praise the Lord--Fox News Radio.    That means that I got to listen to the Republican Presidential debate.   Since my party is currently practicing its far too familiar circular firing squad drama, I was most interested in the opening act of the Kabuki Theater.   I also consider politics to be a participation sport, so I got out my legal pad, made my list of participants and reverted to a system I have used for years during debates.    I listen (and here is where the radio becomes an advantage) to each answer and score the response.   Failures to answer the question or a “God, motherhood and apple pie” response get a minus sign which is worth zero points.   By the way, saying “I want to restore America ’s greatness” falls into this category. ...

In case the title did not convince the men in my audience to forgo this column, let me warn you right now that both some of the language and one of the references will make you squirm.               It seems that Gwyneth Paltrow is advocating that all women get their vaginas steam cleaned.   Does Bissell even make an attachment for that?   The first thing I thought when I read that was “…what on earth did she spill down there?”   But one must consider the source.             Gwyneth Paltrow is a movie star, but that term just doesn’t mean the same thing now that it did when Kathryn Hepburn and Bette Davis were on the silver screen.   Paltrow is a pale woman.   That describes her skin, eyes, talent and mental abilities.   Balancing that, she has good looks, good breeding   (sired by producer Bruce Paltrow out of actress Blyth Danner),...

Life is too heavy today; let’s take a walk on the light side.     I miss Chicago .  Between the CBOT ( Chicago Board of Trade) and the Picasso Thing in Daly Plaza , Chicago is a toddling town.   One of my favorite spots was the now closed Mashed Potato Club.  In the winter of 2000 my husband and I had been recently employed by a Chicago based company and were in town for orientation.   We were staying at a downtown hotel and looking for a place to eat.   Tom was scanning the dining guide in the hotel room.                “How does this sound?   The Mashed Potato Club, featuring roast beef, 70 different kinds of mashed potatoes, erotic art and an eclectic crowd.”   Between the roast beef and erotic art Tom had found the masculine version of gustatory nirvana.   We checked the map, grabbed our coats and were on our way.   On the cold walk to the restaurant...

The San Francisco Department of Partial Education has decided not to offer Algebra 1 for its students until high school.    Lizzy Hull Barnes, speaking for the SFUSD says that exposing all students to high-quality math instruction is a social issue.   [ Damn, I thought it was good instruction!]   She goes on to say that SFUSD considers the practice of tracking students or separating them based on talent and ability is simply wrong.   [ Does that also apply to allowing anyone to play on intramural teams?]   She then goes on to say that being good at math is no longer about answer-getting.   [ Trust me, this is not the woman I want in charge of figuring interest rates at the bank!]             Ms. Barnes has never taught anything but elementary level math and I doubt she has an advanced degree in pure mathematics.   In any event, her words speak to a total lack of understanding of good ma...

An old friend died on Monday.   I should have felt a shudder in the warp of space and time, but my friend was not that kind of woman.   She was one of the day-to-day warriors who triumph simply by putting one foot in front of the other.   Yet, if her story were writ large, she would have been many things to many people.   If only Lois had been born beautiful, or wealthy, or powerful…instead she was born with spina bifida and hydrocephalus.   She told me once that the doctors told her parents she would never leave the hospital; see her first birthday; reach adulthood; live a normal life—the list went on.    She died at 81, the mother of four children and a woman who had lived a complete life.   She sang in the choir, loved to read and played cards.   My, did Lois love to play cards.   Bridge was her drug of choice.   She did not play it well, but she enjoyed the game, the society and laughter.   Our Philia Bridge Club has...

I know why Obama and Democrats want this disastrous Iranian “Nukes for Peace” deal.   They want to weaken both Israel and the United States .   They are firmly committed to the idea that we have sinned in the eyes of a secular humanist god and deserve some comeuppance.   Obama is also delighted that John Kerry got one thing right.   Iran ’s first line in the sand won’t be crossed for five years, three years after Obama is out of office.   By that time the Asterisk-in-Chief will be home free; polishing his Nobel Peace Prize and watching the sunset in what ever country he chooses to live after leaving office.   In any event, I get why the President wants this deal.   What I don’t get is why the Russians want it.   Hillary can present all the snarky, little red reset buttons she wants to foreign leaders, but the minute her back is turned Putin will take that button and shove it right up….oh, sorry, I digress.   The fact is Russia has...

Sen. John McCain stands with his arms at an odd angle.   He moves them only by moving his whole shoulder.   His arms reach for objects by moving outward and then forward instead of in a normal forward flow.    On October 26, 1967 a 31 year old John McCain was flying his 23 rd bombing mission over North Vietnam .   He was shot down and ejected from the cockpit, but that is a violent act and he broke both arms and a leg upon impact with the ocean.   Those were not the wounds he suffers from today.    The North Vietnamese who pulled him from the water deliberately crushed his shoulder with a rifle butt and then bayoneted him.   He was transported to the Hanoi Hilton, the North’s primary prisoner of war camp.   There he was refused medical attention until it was discovered that his father was an Admiral in the United States Navy, and commander of all U.S. forces in Vietnam .         ...

Gina McCarthy is head of the Environmental Protection Agency.   Unfortunately, in this administration intellectual acumen has been bred out of its minions like noses out of pugs.               There certainly is nothing in her college transcript to make you stand up and yell “there’s the rocket scientist in the room.”   Her bachelor’s is in social anthropology and her master’s is in environmental health engineering planning and policy.   These are the kind of soft science degrees you get by watching The China Syndrome instead of studying adiabatic charts.                 With a transcript that weak she never came close to a competitive job in industry.   Instead she worked as a bureaucrat for 25 years.   Now, you can survive as a bureaucrat by suffocating any part of your brain that uses creative thinking.   But to work your ...

Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.   That was the thinking of France and West Germany in 1951 when they decided that the best way to prevent a third devastating world war would be to make everyone play together—at least economically.               To accomplish mutually assured economic dependence they joined with Italy , Belgium , Luxembourg and the Netherlands to create a common market for their coal and steel.   The road to Hell is paved with good intentions and this was just such an example.   Coal and steel were essential to 50’s era industrial nations and the idea was that if you remove competition for these vital resources you remove a rivalry that could rise to the level of war.   By 1999 the one world ball had rolled into a European common market with a common currency.   One big happy family!   Well, every family has its problems.     ...

I love our National Anthem.   It is strong.   The words have force and it can be played with soft passages followed by magnificent crescendos.   It fits this country.   But, of course, it is well nigh impossible to sing.   [Not that I can sing anything.   I may have many good qualities but anything approaching, “the arts” falls well out of my bailiwick.]    But whether I sing it or just lip sync, The Star Spangled Banner is a great anthem. However, it is not my favorite patriotic song.   That ranking goes to America the Beautiful, written by Katherine Lee Bates in 1893. America the Beautiful O beautiful for spacious skies, For amber waves of grain, For purple mountain majesties Above the fruited plain! America ! America ! God shed his grace on thee And crown thy good with brotherhood From sea to shining sea! Most every American knows that first verse.   They also know that Bates wrote the original p...