News/No News, President Obama and Nicolae Carpathia

New Zealand and America appear to be two formerly British countries separated by a common language.  There are times when it is hard to believe that everyone I meet is actually speaking English.  Yesterday we were speaking to a very nice gentlemen at a repair shop and, while I did carry on a conversation, I honestly only caught about every third word.  I also know from the number of times I am asked to repeat myself that they are having as much trouble with my, “accent” as I am with theirs.  Actually, I have a fool proof excuse for asking New Zealanders to repeat themselves—and a little slower, please and thank you.  I simply apologize for my 67 year old ears (no lie there) and explain that I am a little hard of hearing.  No offense to be taken.   

            But, no doubt about it, I am learning to speak, “New Zealandese.”  Here are just a few examples:

            A Long Black:  our version of a good cup of black coffee.

            A Short Black: an espresso size and strength cup of coffee for those mornings when a regular cup of Joe just isn’t going to move the needle on the old, “wake-o-meter.”

            All Blacks: not coffee at all, but the national rugby team (named for the color of their uniforms—all black with a single silver fern leaf on the breast).  I watched part of a game on television while on the interisland ferry from the north to the south island.  I like rugby, but I didn’t have the slightest idea what was happening.  From what I could tell, rugby is like football with no uniforms and no rules.

            Cricketer:  someone who plays cricket, a game like baseball with too many uniforms and too many rules.

            Trundler: shopping cart

            A Mob: herd of sheep

            A Flash Mob: fast moving sheep.  If you’re not talking sheep in this country you’re not talking at all friends.  Sheep out-number humans two to one in New Zealand.

            Good on You: a general benediction.

            Do you want to know what nobody talks about?  Not one word?  Not one news article?  President Barrack Obama!

I have been in New Zealand just shy of a month and while our camper does not have television, we have a radio and listen to it daily.   We heard, briefly, about the Super Bowl.  We heard about Phillip Seymour Hoffman’s death.  We even heard about Woody Allen and charges of pedophilia.  What about the affairs of state in the greatest nation on earth?  Nothing.  Zilch.  Zero. Nada.  None.

This is not the first time Tom and I have been abroad.  We are used to hearing a little about the governmental workings of the United States in any nation’s world news.  This isn’t just a paucity of American news, it is a total absence. 

It is as if this very civilized country is over the well-delivered (but meaningless) mouthing’s of the Little Prince.  Evidently there is a price to be paid for sucking up to your enemies while dismissing your friends.  I believe the disillusionment was partially caused by the media treating Obama like the second coming of Christ.  Instead of a savior we were stuck with Nicolae Carpathia from the Left Behind series.  [Think about it: a man with no living parents, a sudden rise to power and a voice that hypnotizes more than it enlightens.]  No, Obama isn’t the anti-Christ.  He is simply, at least in New Zealand, a non-entity, our asterisk-in-chief, and that is a little sad.

Learning a lot and keeping the faith.