Blame the Neanderthals for Autism

 You have a better chance of acquiring autism from Neanderthals than Tylenol.  Let me explain why.

First, I love Gary Larson cartoons.  They will make me laugh every time.  But part of humor is making a caricature of reality.  So, let’s start by clearing our minds of the “Cavemen” depicted in Larson’s cartoons, old 1950’s movies and elementary school stereotypes.  I became fascinated with Neanderthals decades ago and am currently doing extensive research on them for a new book.  That interest was intensified when my husband and I took part in the Human Genome Project.  This massive, world-wide project began in October of 1990 and was completed in 2003 with 92% of the sequence completed (100% in 2022).  Among the many useful and important findings of this project was proof that all humans of European or Asian descent have 2%-4% Neanderthal DNA. 

This residual DNA is the result of interbreeding between Neanderthals and modern humans.  None of this is a surprise, it is conformation of what anthropologists have assumed for decades.  It is an old story.  New guys move into the old neighborhood.  They are met with suspicion which turns into antagonism and conflict.  Then boy meets girl, curiosity is fueled by biology and suddenly you have West Side Story breaking out all over the place.  

Speaking of the old neighborhood, Neanderthals had been the only game in town for a long time. They occupied Europe for around 350,000 years, finally dying out about 40,000 years ago, though their DNA stays alive in you and I.  They were humans, not a step on the evolutionary ladder.  If you gave them a shave, haircut, jeans and a T-shirt they could walk down the street today and not be given a glance.  Their numbers were always small, and that worked against them.  Breeding within a small group increases the chances of recessive and potentially harmful genes being manifested.  Yet they were able to pass on their paleogenetic load to the modern humans that were spreading throughout their territory. 

In a serendipitous moment, my research interfaced with the Oval Office Occupant deciding that acetaminophen (which Trump cannot pronounce and evidently didn’t read in his script before making his announcement) causes autism.  Let’s start with the fact (not assumption) that there are zero scientific, peer-reviewed studies that show a cause-effect relationship between Tylenol and autism.  Let me quote the response to the President’s announcement from Mel Merritt, head of Policy and Campaigns at the National Autistic Society:

"This is dangerous, it's anti-science and it's irresponsible. President Donald Trump is peddling the worst myths of recent decades. Such dangerous pseudo-science is putting pregnant women and children at risk and devaluing autistic people. 

“Let's be clear – painkillers do not cause autism and vaccines do not cause autism. Large-scale studies have shown that there is no robust, scientific evidence to support this claim. It’s nothing more than fearmongering. 

“The incessant misinformation about autism from President Trump and Robert F Kennedy Jr risks undermining decades of research by respected experts in the field.”

That point being made, let me give you an example of real scientific evidence.  There is collaborative scientific research showing genetic traits modern humans inherited from Neanderthals could increase a person’s susceptibility to autism. Children with autism do not have more Neanderthal DNA, but they frequently have dense clusters of specific Neanderthal genes from our evolutionary ancestors.  Essentially, you have a better chance of manifesting autism because of a Neanderthal than from Tylenol.

Maybe the three stooges of medical research (Trump, RFK and Oz) need to investigate that pesky problem of Neanderthal DNA. Oh, wait, they won't. Unlike the pharmaceutical industry, there are no Neanderthals around for them to shake down for protection money. 

Read a little about our ancestors and keep the faith.